For most people making the decision to begin counseling, comes with much contemplation that has occurred for quite some time before one finally makes the decision. This decision can be tough enough on it’s own and then you are quickly faced with the new task of finding a counselor-the right counselor, that will be a good fit for who you are, and what you need can be difficult and confusing. I’d like to offer you a few tips to help you on your search; to make this process easy to understand, and help you find the right counselor to begin feeling your stronger self again today!
When I think about clients that have found a counselor that meets their therapeutic needs, and is a good fit to their personality and comfort-ability; I always picture a dancing couple in my head. Counselors and clients that fit together comfortably remind me of a sweet old married couple dancing on effortlessly on the dance floor together.
Just like a perfect couple that has found their rhythm together, they too had to do some searching; and probably had a few bad dance partners along the way. Finding the perfect fit in your counselor can take time- just like in dating, we need to know ourselves and what we are looking for in a counselor to best support us in exploring ourselves and reaching our goals.
Sometime on your search you will learn what you don’t want in a counselor, and that’s OK too. It is expected that finding the right counselor can be a dance that might be awkward at the start, but over time you should feel that your counselor can lead you, guide you, and help you to feel at ease to trust yourself and begin to understand, forgive, and allow yourself you to grow to your fullest potential.
Below you find a few things to consider when beginning your search to find a counselor that is the best match for you.
What to look for when starting your search for a counselor
-It is important that you search for counselors that are clinically licensed (Licensed Clinical Social Worker-LCSW, Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor-LCPC, Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Licensed Mental Health Counselor-LMHC)
Having a counselor that is clinically licensed will provide you with a professional that has undergone extensive clinical supervision beyond their graduate studies (typically 3,000 hours or more). This is important, so that you know your counselor has had more than just book training, but real experience working with clients while receiving supervision with an expert in the field, to ensure that they have the best training to support you.
-Search for counselors that have a graduate degree in the field of counseling (Masters in Social Work, Masters in Mental Health Counseling, Masters in Psychology, Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy). Unfortunately; there are actually people out there claiming to be a counselor or therapist without the proper training and educational requirements, so be sure to check their credentials.
-You don’t have to be an expert on therapy techniques, but it is a good idea to have a good understanding of how you’d like your therapy to flow (do you want be focused on solutions to move yourself forward, do you want be given homework to work on the techniques discussed, do you want to better understand your personal and relational dynamics, are you looking for support in controlling your thoughts and emotions?) Having some preference or thoughts about the type of therapy that would make you feel most comfortable and support the goals that you have for yourself, will move you one step closer to finding the right counselor to meet your needs.
-Most counselors have specific niches, or specializations for the work that they do. Think about the goals that you have for yourself and search for a counselor that is an expert in the area you are looking to improve. Do you want to improve how you feel about yourself, do you need treatment for a mental health condition, or are you looking for guidance on goals that you have for yourself and your future? Most counselors will typically share their specialties with you on their personal websites, or psychology today profiles.
Where to start your search
-Just like you would ask your doctor or close friends and family for doctor recommendations, it can also be helpful to start here when looking for a new counselor. Your doctor, friends, and family usually know you the best and might know a good fit that would support you and what you are looking for.
If you’d prefer to do your search independently, starting with Psychology Today Online is a solid starting point. This is a good tool to use as it verifies that each counselor is licensed and has graduate level education, so you can rest assured that you will be only searching through counselors that have the necessary training and legal requirements to practice therapy. On Psychology Today, therapists will usually have professional bios that explain how they can best serve you. Most of the therapists also include pictures of themselves and their office, which can help in easing some anxiety upon scheduling your first session.
Before you decide, do your research!
When you think you’ve found a counselor that might be a good fit for what you’re looking for, check out your potential counselor online-google them, and see what you find! Now a days it is super easy to get a feel for someone before you meet face to face. Someone that has strong online presence can really help you to understand if you’ll connect with them. Look through their website, read their blogs, check out their social media posts; do you feel that they are personally connecting with you and speaking to you through their writing? Ask yourself if you’d feel comfortable talking with them. If the answer is Yes and Yes, then it is likely that you’ll feel just as comfortable in person.
When you call to schedule your first appointment
Think about what questions you have for the counselor or what information you’ll want to know about the counselor. Write your questions down and and be prepared to ask them over the phone or when you send your email inquiring availability. (This is your chance to interview your counselor, and ask them as many questions as you’d like 😉
When I receive calls from potential clients the main question that I receive is, “Can you tell me about yourself and your experiences?” People want to know about me as a counselor and person. They want to feel comfortable with me, before we even sit down to work together. They also feel it is important to understand my professional experiences and approach of counseling that I take when working with clients and if that approach will work for them.
It is also important to ask about availability for future sessions and the expected fee for each session when you call. Therapy can usually take between 6-10 sessions ( this is an average, every client is different and the number of sessions truly varies from person to person) to really work through your goals, and it will be important that you find a counselor that has session availability that works for you and your schedule. Nothing is worse than thinking you’ve found the perfect counselor and then finding out you’ll never be able to get in to see them! Also, asking what you can expect each session to cost and what payment is accepted will help you in determining if this will be someone that you can afford (it doesn’t make any sense to improve one are of your life and then create more stress for yourself financially). Most therapists can bill your insurance, or use a sliding scale payment (payments that are agreed upon based on what your budget will allow) or offer a standard fee per session.
Meeting with a counselor
Just because you’ve met with a counselor once doesn’t meet they have to be your counselor. You can take as long as you’d like to decide if you think that this counselor will be a good fit for you. To help in this process you might want to consider reflecting on how the counselor made you feel during your session together. Begin to ask yourself a few questions to reflect on how comfortable the counselor made you feel and if you felt that you were heard.
A few questions to ask yourself might be:
Did the counselor’s vibe match yours? For me it’s not usually a good fit, if the client is looking for someone that is very serious and cold (I have the old picture of the client laying on a couch and the therapist sitting behind them in my head) If a client is looking for this style of counseling, they won’t find it with me. I engage with my clients, laugh with them, and partner with them through their journey.
Did you feel respected in the session by the counselor? Did you feel that the counselor genuinely was interested in what brought you in to see them, did they express empathy and seem connected with what you shared? In all strong relationships, the existence of mutual respect has to be present and this holds true in a client/counselor relationship.
Do you feel that you can trust this counselor, did they genuinely listen while you were talking? Was confidentiality explained to you? Not only by law, is confidentiality required of your counselor but it is necessary to build a trusting relationship and creates a safe space for personal exploration and growth to take place.
Now-give yourself a pat on the back!
After you’ve decided to see a counselor and have done your research to find your best match, be sure to give yourself some much-deserved credit for the work that you have just done. These initial steps in the process seem simple but are truly the keys in beginning to unlock your future happiness, personal growth, healing, and self-improvement.
As always, if you have any questions or feedback for me on the content I provide please do not hesitate to reach out. I truly only want to offer content to you that is of value. If you have any suggestion for future posts, please feel free to pass them along!